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December 10, 2018

Understand That Some Veterans May Refuse Home Care at First

Stephen was the type of person who didn’t accept help easily. He was a fiercely independent man who took a great deal of pride in not only taking care of himself, but also his family. He was very protective of his wife and children, whether they were young or heading off to college and then into their adult lives.

When Stephen began struggling with basic tasks of everyday life, his wife took charge. She tried to temper his enthusiasm to do a lot of things around the house, but that was difficult, to say the least.

By the time he was 74, he became acutely aware of his limitations.

That was about six years beyond the time he needed to accept that, if you asked his wife. They were the same age and as he struggled and she took on a greater physical burden, it started to take a toll on her health as well.

That’s when the topic of home care came up.

Being a veteran of the Army, Stephen had an incredibly difficult time even accepting the idea of relying on his wife, let alone anyone else, for some basic things around the house. He kept assuming that since he was able to get out of bed he should be able to take a shower without help, take out the garbage, tend to the lawn, and so on.

He had friends who were in their 70’s, even approaching 80 who were still doing these things. He wondered why he couldn’t do the same things, so he kept refusing to even discuss the topic of home care.

Eventually, though, he had to admit his limitations.

He may have been aware of them, but that didn’t mean he accepted them. He kept pushing himself and, when he couldn’t do it on his own, his wife picked up the slack. When he noticed just how much this was negatively impacting her, he finally acknowledged the need for some assistance.

That’s when they contacted a home care agency.

Stephen’s wife was the one who made first contact. They didn’t know how they were going to afford this, but with their children living in other states, friends no longer physically able to help them, and neighbors who were too busy, they figured it was time to look into it.

Because of his time in service, because of their limited financial means, and because of a documentable requirement for home care, they were confident they would qualify for financial assistance through the VA through a pension called Aid and Attendance benefit.

Some veterans, like Stephen, may refuse home care at first, but eventually they will come to realize they can’t do this on their own. It’s really only a matter of time.

If you or an aging loved one are considering Home Care Services in St. Charles IL, please contact the caring staff at Big Hearts Home Care today! 

Matthew Calcagno

Matthew is a graduate of Robert Morris College and is a U.S. Navy veteran.Matthew founded Big Hearts Home Care after over a decade at HP. Spending time volunteering at his grandparent’s senior center inspired him to make a bigger difference in the quality of care seniors receive.His grandfather whom turned 100 in 2015 is still a major inspiration to him in seeing that service is provided with a family focused touch.

It is his passion and commitment to providing quality service that has awarded Big Hearts Home Care as Provider of Choice and Employer of Choice in the Chicagoland area. He believes that being an independently owned and operated company allows him the flexibility to manage the business in a way that better serves the clients.


"Helping people is what I was meant to do; it inspires and motivates me," Calcagno said. "I also get to help veterans - assisting them in the VA pension process and providing care for several in the area. This is what I love to do."

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